[Colm Moore]

http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/...281825646.html

Plain sailing for official Luas opening

Last Saturday’s official opening of the Luas Cherrywood extension was a surreal affair, by all accounts. The extension – two stops of which won’t open because development never took place – was launched by the Taoiseach in an unfinished building belonging to Treasury Holdings. So in a way, Biffo was a guest of Nama.

In the grey gloom of this shell, he joked it was “pitch dark” and he couldn’t read his speech, although a couple of lights had been hastily strung up behind him. There was no ceiling.

Ciarán Cuffe of the Greens was doing his Kennedy-esque best “I want to speak to you of the past, the present and the future,” he trilled. The tram took off on a rollicking jaunt through unfinished apartment blocks and weed-strewn industrial sites, trundling past the gates of the British Ambassador’s house.

“How does he get out?” wondered the Biff.

There was a hairy moment on the platform after the speeches.

The Taoiseach emerged just as the brass band were getting stuck into a spirited rendition of “What Shall We Do With the Drunken Sailor? (early in the morning).” His handler nearly fainted.